I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
