Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize