we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
