Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize