It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
