What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
So much rum. So many feels.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
