So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
