i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize