when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
