I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
love makes seman taste better
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
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He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
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Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?