Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
