I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
