hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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