she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
