Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
