just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
