My friends, they love my intelligence
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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