Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
