bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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