Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Found the puke drawer
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
So much Jack, so little girl.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize