just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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