There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
