He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?