the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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