Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
