I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
