Whoa Z and x make the same sound
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
