And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Blood and glitter go together right?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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