I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Come share oat with me in your robe
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
