idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
