I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize