If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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