Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
