Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
i think i just lost a toe
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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