the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
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