her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.