kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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