this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
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I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
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not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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