Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
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