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• (330): View more from Ohio

  so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.

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• (575): View more from New Mexico

  So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Marry him. Now.

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.

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• (845): View more from New York

  I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding

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