so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize