There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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