So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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