I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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