Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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