Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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