Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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