we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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