I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
