It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
