SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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