so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
It was like giving head to a cactus.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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