Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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